It's Never Too Late to Live Happily Ever After

It’s Never Too Late to Live Happily Ever After,” read the colorful oversized Coffee cup flower pot at our table at LeQuy, our favorite restaurant for Pho, Vietnamese noodle soup (click photo for expanded view).

The uplifiting wisdom saying coincided with my having read about a recent study conducted by Harvard psychologists Matthew K. Killingsworth and Daniel T. Gilbert. Working with a sampling of 15,000 people from a broad socio-economic background, across 80 countries, they concluded that a “Wandering Mind” is an Unhappy Mind. The happiest people seem to be those who are consistently more mindful of the present moment and become least happy when they allow their minds to wander.

It confirmed everything I had learned from many years of Mindfulness training, my yoga practice and reading classic books on the subject like, “Be Here Now,” written by former Harvard professor and American spiritual teacher Ram Das (born Richard Alpert). Still, I slip now and again. But like all worthwhile endeavors it requires practice, and worth the effort.

We spend almost 50% of our waking hours thinking about something other than the task at hand. A great deal of time is employed ruminating about the past, contemplating the future, and fantasizing to avoid being bored. In fact, “The Mind,” produces about 60,000 thought a day, 80% of which are negative.

The researchers noted, “That people were happiest when making love, exercising, or engaging in conversation,” and; “least happy when resting, working, or using a home computer.” I would add that people are also happiest when they are passionate about their favorite pastimes like gardening, art, music, dance, bicycling, etc.

I was once asked by an acquaintance, “How can you have a blog entitled: enjoyyourlifenow.net, nobody can be happy all the time?
I explained that a happy life does not mean the absence of difficulities but facing them head on, knowing that “this too shall pass.” 

One of my mentors, Joseph Campbell to whom I paid tribute to, in my book: Invisible Means of Support, A Transformational Journey wrote: “You learn to recognize the positive values in what appear to be the negative moments and aspects of your life.” When I have what appears to be a bad day, I invariably can recall an event or two that gladdened my heart. Years ago, I even wrote a poem in my journal about it called “Not a Bad Day for a Sad Day,” that touched on this subject.

Happiness, it turns out is a skill, a power we possess within ourselves. We only need to know how to harness it. Cultivating joy or contentment in the midst of life's challenges and difficulties is pivotal. Joy is not some self-improvement prop we tell ourselves but an inclination of the heart that softens and eases around a difficulty that can taken hold of us at any given time.

Following dinner at our friend Marianne's home, who is an artist, poet and children's book writer, she sent us a handwritten card—unusual in this day and age—that read: “Through the spiraling of time and changes, we are grateful for your friendship. We have endured great loss in the past year, and have wonderful joys to savor every day…Ah, such is the heartbreak and beauty of this precious life.”

The front of the card had the following quote by Voltaire (Francois-Marie Arouet, 1694-1778), a French Enlightenment writer, historian and philosopher that read: "I have decided to be happy, because it is good for my health.” In spite of a tumultuous career at a time of great change, he knew as does singer, songwriter and producer Pharrell Williams, that happiness is a choice.

The Iconic Chair Lift Dance at Michelle and Kyle's Wedding That Left Everyone Smiling

Martha Graham called dance the “hidden language of the soul,” and Gabrielle Roth says, “We dance to disappear in something bigger…to fall in love with the spirit in all things.”

Since Michelle and Kyle got married in Napa recently, guests couldn’t stop talking about the dance called “The Horah” where everyone gathers around the bride and groom and dances around them in a circle. Having married into a Jewish family, I have had many opportunities to partake in this fun, heart-opening, spirited dance.

For those unfamiliar with this circle dance, at some point, chairs are brought on to the dance floor for the married couple to sit on, and several able bodied guests (hopefully not hammered by alcohol)🙂 hoist them up into the air like a “King and Queen,” for the evening. The Horah is a type of Israeli folk dance that originated from Romania (and dates back even further to ancient Greece). During this topsy-turvy dance where the bride and groom are up in the air together, they each hold on to the end of a handkerchief or white linen table napkin. This smbolizes the connection to each other and represents the sealing of their marital vows. 

One look at these photos, emailed to me by my sister Josie, and brother Steve, and one can see that being lifted in the chairs can be as scary as it is exhilirating. It’s like riding a mechanical bull at your local country western bar—not for the faint of heart. If you don’t believe me, just ask Academy Award winning actor Michael Douglas. During his son Dylan’s Bar Mitzvah celebration, he pulled a muscle while being hoisted up in the air during the chair dance. All the jerking up and down, and back and forth, left him limping for days. That said, I am happy to report we all survived the dance without injury.

The “chair dance," has always been a mainstay of Jewish wedding celebrations. Ever since Fidler on the Roof, it has become part of our pop culture. It also has become part of the the music/dance play list for interfaith couples—where one spouse is Jewish. Judging by their own experience and that of our guests, I know Kyle and Michelle would agree that the wedding reception wouldn’t have been complete without The Horah circle dance and chair lift. This beautiful ritual symbolizes how much joy family and friends have for our beloved newlyweds. 
 

“Come Be Greek for a Day,” said the Invitation and share in the Greek Traditions of Food, Drink and Dance!

Cecile and I accepted and attended the 45th annual San Jose Greek Food and Cultural Festival Yesterday, sponsored by St. Nicholas Greek Orthodox Church.

While on the mini-bus shuttle that took us to the event, I sat next to a man from Romania. He told me he tried to get his kids to join him in experiencing a new culture but they weren’t interested. “They were too busy playing electronic games and texting their friends,” he said. Though he smiled while saying this, I could feel his sense of frustration. He could have easily used the phrase: “It’s Greek to me,” to explain his kids incomprehensible behavior in not taking advantage of the opportunity offered to them. “You don’t have to travel out of the country to enjoy other cultures,” he added as we arrived at our destination. 

As we exited the shuttle and bought our tickets we began to smell the aroma of beef, chicken, lamb and other foods being prepared by Greek Chefs in the Bay Area using recipes that have been handed down for generations. We ordered the traditional Gyro Sandwich, a spicy and savory pressed meat served with cucumber sauce on soft and fluffy Greek pita bread, an Athenian Salad and shared a bottle of Greek Beer.

After lunch we moved to a large tented area to watch the adorable children perform traditional Greek folk dances called: “Philotimo” and “Meraki,” as their proud smiing parents took photos to memorialize the event. The word Philotimo we were told means, “friend,” and Meraki means, “the soul, creativity and love you put into something.” In front of me a father of one of the girls had a T-Shirt with a quote from George Panayotopoulos that read: "The beauty of Greek Dancing is that you don't dance with your feet...you dance with your heart."

In the end, we experienced the culture and hospitality of the fun loving Greek people in a spacious outdoor, open-market setting under a sunny day. The food was delicious and we enjoyed communing with Greeks and non-Greeks alike. All of us were walking about, happy to be alive. Zorba said it best, "...there is only one life for all men...there is no other...all that can be enjoyed must be enjoyed here." By the time we were ready to leave we realized we “did” feel “Greek for a Day.” We even made it to the Parthenon (see photo).

Maybe the Romanian man I met on the shuttle was right. Maybe, “You don’t [always] have to travel out of the country to enjoy other cultures.” Maybe it’s just about showing up, as a guest at someone’s home ready to accept their hospitality and their desire to make you feel at home. OPA!

Angels Among Us: A Memorial Tribute to an Amazing Woman

At some point in our lives, when we least expect it, we encounter a person that leaves a compassionate and loving imprint on one’s family by performing a “mitzvah,” which in Hebrew means a good or charitable deed. 
In our case that person was Karen Mullens Michane, a New Jersey native like myself who recently passed away at her home in surrounded by her family. 

After my mom died four years ago, Rev. Alex Santora, pastor of Hoboken’s Church of Our Lady of Grace and columnist for the Jersey Journal, arranged to have Karen administer Holy Communion once a month to my 100 year old dad, Frank Augustine. It couldn’t have been a better match. 

In an email to Rev. Alex, which I was copied on, Karen had expressed her “thanks for the opportunity,” to be of service to a man whom she called “a remarkable gentleman and a true Hoboken treasure.” She enjoyed my dad's "stories of the old Hoboken.” They brought back memories of her late dad, who also grew up in Hoboken, where Marlon Brando starred in "On The Waterfront), and where Frank Sinatra got his start as a crooner. 

Karen was truly a courageous and amazing woman—a godsend if you will. During my many visits from California to see my dad she always had a beautiful smile on her face, in spite of living with a life threatening illness.She bestowed on dad gifts of joy, optimism, kindness, compassion and graciously offered a listening ear. He thoroughly enjoyed her visits. 

She was a woman of deep faith and as she was approaching what I perceived to be last stage of her life, asked me to keep her in my prayers. I wholeheartedly obliged by lighting a virtual candle and included a healing prayer on gratefulness.org, a website founded by Brother David Stendl-Rast, a Benedictine monk and Zen practitioner I met at a spiritual retreat at Esalen Institute in Big Sur, CA. 

Karen had gone to the Academy of St. Aloysius (my dad’s middle name) in Jersey City. She was one of the first women accepted to St. Peter's University, taught at St. Vincent de Paul in Bayonne before becoming a principal probation officer. After retiring 33 years later she participated in liturgy at St. Joseph’s Church and became the executive secretary for the local homeless shelter. I enjoyed hearing about her travels to Ireland, Scotland and the Vatican City. She also enjoyed goiing to the theater, reading mysteries, and listening to Bob Dylan. I would like to express my heartfelt condolences to her surviving family, relatives and close friends, most of whom I never met. It was an honor to have known her and experience her angelic presence. At the request of her family, a donation was made to the Hoboken Homeless Shelter in her memory. 
May she rest in peace!

The Hypnotic Glow and Quality of Stillness of a Cactus Flower

"Flowers don't worry about how they're going to bloom. They just open up and turn toward the light and that makes them beautiful." —Jim Carrey

I am grateful to Howard, our next door neighbor, who has been nurturing a bright red cactus flower in a pot that has a short but showy blooming period. He called it an Epiphyllum (Greek: for upon the leaf), and he has been hybridizing these type of plants for over 20 years. As shown in these photos I took, It sits on the corner of a wall that borders our back yard patio. When the sunlight hits it, it exudes a hypnotic glow and a quaity of stillness and silence that sometimes eludes me during the course of a busy day. I literally “love” this flower, and in a reflective moment, I realized that Love is not about possession, but about appreciation and beauty, and a sacred wellspring that is always available to us if we take the time to see.

Memorial Day Weekend Brunch at Shoreline with our Chicago Family

Memorial Day Weekend Brunch at Shoreline with our Chicago Family

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it

                                                                                    —William Arthur Ward

Just past the Shoreline Amphitheater sits Shoreline at Mountain View, California, a 750-acre wildlife refuge and recreation area on the SF Bay, located in the heart of Silicon Valley. We had Brunch yesterday at the Lakeside Cafe with Cecile's brother Mark Weiner, wife Barbara and Ilana and Zachary who enjoyed an hour of paddle boating while I did a two mile walk on my favorite trail around the lake and and along the Bay. The weather was accommodating, the colors were bright and cheerful and it seemed everyone was out to embrace this beautiful day.

Cycling the Backroads of Napa Valley Before Michelle and Kyle's Wedding Ceremony

While the ladies were getting their hair and nails done at the Spa at Silverado Resort in Napa—including my wife Cecile and daughter Michelle—Kyle played 18 rounds of golf with twenty of his friends and family members.
What did I do? Thanks to my friend James “Jimi” Hunter, we rode electric bikes that he and his beloved Jennifer brought up from Los Gatos. Everyone needs a friend like Jimi. I see him as the “Minister of Fun.” He motivates you to get out there and do things. It got back to me that he even got my son Jason and a few strangers to take his bike for a short spin.

Napa Valley is “an embarrassment of riches,” including 500 wineries, top rated restaurants and cycling routes, many with no designated bike lanes. We just made it up as we road along. In was a perfect morning to go riding, sunny, mild, fresh valley air—a respite from the late afternoon 90 degree heat we were in for. We drove in some of the most serene, scenic, friendly and low traffic parts of the valley. We stopped along the way to visit cattle, horses as seen in the photos, then continued our ride past manicured vineyards and private estates. The two hour riding time never went so fast. We got back to our respective rooms with a few hours to spare before Cecile and I walked Michelle down the bridal path, then gave her hand to Kyle and they were pronounced husband and wife by Jason, The Officiant, under the ceremonial Chuppa. It doesn’t get any better than this. Though, we hear grand kids are fun.🙂

Michelle & Kyle Tie the Knot in the Heart of Napa Valley

“Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life."
—Richard Bach

The Grove at Silverado Resort and Spa in Napa is an all outdoor wedding venue situated in the middle of our two golf courses. It is surrounded by towering oaks, beautiful gardens, and spectacular views of the greens and mountain ranges. It is the reason it is one of the most popular and inspired settings to get married. When we saw our beautiful daughter Michelle in her wedding dress surrounded by her lovely bridesmaids our hearts melted. It finally struck us, we are giving our daughter away to Kyle, the love of her life. We couldn’t be more pleased with her choice.

A Successful marriage is not about finding a person you can live with, but discovering that special partner you can’t possibly live without. Michelle and Kyle had many opportunities to meet: They went to Cal Poly, attended a semester abroad in Florence, one of the most romantic cities in the world, were in Las Vegas on the same weekend, to name a few, but it was not their time, yet. As our Jason, who officiated the wedding ceremony with creative brilliance, love, and inspired humor said: “The universe wouldn’t place them together again until four years later, when Michelle saw on Facebook that Kyle was getting ready to move to NYC where she lived at the time. She sent Kyle a note and said she’d love to connect with a fellow Cal Poly alum once he gets settled in. A couple of weeks later he invited her to a housewarming party,” and the rest as they say is history.

This begs the question how are couples fated to meet? What is the mysterious matchmaking forces at play behind the scenes that make it happen? In ancient Chinese folklore, the wise sages believed that there is a red thread that magically connects two people destined to become lovers, regardless of time, space or circumstance called, “The Red String of Fate.” Legend has it that the string may stretch or tangle but the connection can never be broken. Rumi, the beloved 13th Persian Sufi poet put it this way: “Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere, they are in each other’s souls,” to which I would add, long before their physical bodies are revealed and the mind registers that, “This is the one! 

As we walked down the bridal path leading to The Grove, the iconic Beatles song: “Here comes the Sun,” was playing. I thought it was a great metaphor for letting go of the youthful uncertainties of the past and basking in the sunlight of marital bliss. It also reminded me when Michelle was born Cecile gave her the Hebrew name—Hila, which means, “Halo of Glowing Light.” She has been the Light of our Life ever since and has radiated that same light to her beloved Kyle, his family, and all their friends. Since meeting Kyle, who has an incredible Lightness of Being in his own right, we have never seen Michelle so happy. When children find true love, parents find true joy. The Toast: Here’s to the past, and the Red String of Fate, that brought you together; Here’s to the present, for all the love and light you share with one another and with your family and friends; Here’s to the future, may all your dreams and wishes come true; and, as you go about your life’s journey together, may you be peaceful, may you be safe, and may you be happy. Congratulations! We love you. 
P.S. I will always remember the Father-Daughter dance song: "Unforgettable," you chose for us. You are unforgettable and so was your marriage to Kyle and the celebration with family and friends.

Celebrating Mother’s Day with a festive Brunch at La Rinconada Country Club

"When you are a Mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A Mother always thinks twice,
once for her Herself and once for Her Child…”
–Sophia Loren

First of all, Cecile and I would like to wish all the special Mothers out there a very Happy Mother’s Day.
Those present at our celebration were AL and Kim Chien who hosted the event. Thank you for your generosity, friendship and love. Also present were AL’s parents Dana and Jack, AL’s brother Rich, his wife Lisa and their adorable children, Alivia and Simone; Kyle, Michelle and Jason. Gifts were exchanged for the moms, the weather couldn’t have been more accommodating, the decorations, flowers and ice sculpture were a work of art, and the food, drinks and dessert was beyond delicious, and the service beyond reproach. 

We often forget where the special milestone holidays we celebrate each year originate, so I thought a brief history
was in order. Celebrating Mother’s Day can be traced back to the ancient Romans and Greeks. In more modern times the celebration of mom’s dates back to the 19th century.
Abolitionist and suffragette Julia Ward Howe wrote the “Mother’s Day Proclamation,” calling mother’s to unite in the promotion of world peace.
1n 1908, Philadelphian feminist activist Anna Jarvis created Mother’s Day after her mother’s death, to honor the sacrifices mothers made for their children. Though Philly is known as the City of Brotherly Love, it could easily be referred to as the City of Motherly Love. Thanks to Jarvis’ campaigning efforts, a Congressional resolution was put intio play and was signed by President Woodrow Wilson in 1914, proclaiming Mother’s Day a national holiday.

Mother's Day: Remembering What My Italian Mother Taught Me

Mother's Day: Remembering What My Italian Mother Taught Me

"The loss of a mother can never be replaced, but the love of a mother can never be lost. —Kelly Flannery

We had dinner with our new friends, Ron and Gail last evening who had downsized around the same time we did, to the same gated community we now call home. One of the topics we spoke about was Mother’s Day. I had said for me Mother’s Day is bittersweet. I lost my mother on Mother’s Day. Ron said, “So did I.” In that moment I had a sobering thought that death never takes a holiday and doesn’t play favorites. When it’s your time, it's your time.

Mom was a beautiful woman, and had a smile that would light up a room; a laugh that was both robust and contagious; and possessed the sharpest of wits that would have you in stitches. She was also a hospitable host to family and friends and had the most charming Italian accent. I used to love going back to the Sicily with her to visit our ancestors.

As a devout Catholic, mom was confident that there was a room waiting for her in the Afterlife. I feel safe in saying that at the ripe old age of 88, bodily ailments and dementia setting in, she was ready to meet her maker.

It’s been four years since she has passed, and I have come to the realization that the best way to cope with having lost my mother is to change the narrative. Instead of looking at it as “my” loss, I chose to refect upon who she was, what she taught me, and the tools at my disposal to deal with the wave of melancholy that rears its head from time to time.

Mom taught me to have respect for my elders.
Mom urged me to stay in college when I was thinking of dropping out.
Mom taught me there was a power bigger than myself.
Mom told me stories of her life in Sicily before coming to America in 1947.
Mom taught me how to hug with a heartfelt embrace.
Mom taught me how to be strong when things weren’t going my way.
Mom nurtured and protected me the best she knew how.
Mom was patient even when I pushed her away.
Mom didn’t give up on me even when I would fall flat on my face.
Mom always tried to cheer me up when I was sad.
Mom taught me the meaning of hard work and sacrifice.
She taught me how to persevere and encouraged me to believe in my dreams.
She was proud of my accomplishments, and most of all she gave me unconditional love.

Common to many religious traditions are Light offerings, contemplation and prayers. They symbolize removing the darkness that death symbolizes and replacing it with the light of wisdom.

I found the single most effective ritual to ease the pain and sadness of a loss is to share it with others who are going through the same thing by employing an ancient Tibetan practice called Tonglen that has gained popularity in the West. It was taught to me and Cecile by Pema Chodron, an American born former elementary school teacher who became a Buddhist nun and utitilizes the medium of Breath. It replaces the dynamics of fear, grief or anger with compassion for oneself and our fellow human beings.Though it may seem counter-intutiive at first, one breathes in the pain and suffering of one’s self and and others who are going through difficult times. Relief is offered with the out-breath to anyone who needs it whether you know them or not. The experiential message of tonglen is that it reduces the feeling of isolation. It is a universal law that at any given time all of us suffering and joy. This is a way to share the burden of grief, and in doing so cuts it in half.

Mom, thank you for all the sacrifices you made for your family both here and abroad. Love you.

My Full Moon Relaxation Aqua Yoga Experience: An Unexpected Delight

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your own being." —Rumi

When I slept passed my favorite afternoon gentle yoga class, that familiar twinge of guilt popped up into my mind. I let it pass. I have a little cue I give myself when the mind tries to stir up discontent. I say, “Not Now!” 
Besides there was an hour long Full Moon Aqua Yoga class at Bay Club Courtside that began at 8 PM. Our California weather has been a little manic depressive lately. It was 85° to 94° degrees recently. Last evening It was 62 degrees and the wind had been blowing strong all day. The offset was that the temperature in the pool was a comfortable 88° 

Our Aqua Yoga Fitness Instructor was Kathleen O’Malley. I introduced myself after one of her morning group classes. I was at poolside reading a book on Mindfulness from the comfort of my lounge chair and took notice of her unique style. Her command over her class was skillful and notable. She gave visual and verbal instructions from her captain’s chair in a clear and concise way. She showed her students how to move gently and rhythmically in the water to build tone and stretch isolated body parts. 

I noticed how she was able to create an instant rapport and sense of camaraderie with her students. She greeted her “wet babies,” as she affectionately called them, with her enthusiastic presence, good sense of humor and signature smile that made eveyone feel at home. At the end of her morning classes she even had her students engage in a few rounds of “laughing yoga.” 

But, the evening Aqua Yoga class added a new dimension. Unlike the morning classes Kathleen joins her students in the water rather than pantomiming the movements from her chair. It’s more mellow. The music is soothing. There were eight hearty souls that braved the unusual cool, windy weather, including Susie Brenner, a former fitness instructor in her own right and a long-time friend of Kathleen’s, Cecile and myself.

We did some warm-up exercises, a series of basic yoga stretches and Kathleen had us use the pool floor and wall to partially create resistance for some of the poses. She also encouraged us to find our balance in the water by employing the use of floating aids (i.e. foam noodles) to gain greater freedom of movement.

The benefits of aqua yoga are similar to studio based yoga. It eases anxiety, promotes relaxation and peace, reduces fatigue, relieves stiffness, increases joint range of motion, improves muscle tone, strengthens the core muscles, and improves breathing patterns. The water’s buoyancy takes the weight off your joints, making what would normally be challenging yoga postures feel effortless. It was humbling to witness some students who have certain day to day physical limitations thrive with a sense of ease, comfort and confidence in a water environment. Whatever preconcieved notions I had in the mind that, “this isn’t really yoga,” were put to rest when I saw how challenging it was to keep one’s balance with the water moving and shifting atround my legs and feet. 

Kathleen cautions students that while aqua yoga has many benefits one must continue with weight training in the gravity environment. It is important for bone health.”

In the first thirty minutes of the class, we did some basic yoga postures and the last half hour we did the aqua yoga version of relaxation pose. Kathleen handed out pool floating aids called noodles to assist us to float while on our backs. We placed one behind our knees, another behind our backs and underarms and third one behind our necks. It sure looks funny, but the end result is a heavenly experience. As we looked up to the sky, it didn’t take long to feel that joyful and magical feeling of weightlessness. I noticed the calming effect of my overactive mind slip into a deep, relaxing, meditative state and when I left the club the full moon followed me home. OMMMMMM!

Our Friends Butterfly Garden & Reflecting on Personal Transformation

Recently, our friends Marianne, an artist and children’s book writer, and her husband, Brian a musician, composer and professor of music at San Jose State invited Cecile and I for dinner at their home. We were taken by the luscious grape colored flowers in their back yard. “We planted them to attract butterflies,” Marianne said. She proceeded to show us a photo she took of a Western Tiger Swallowtail Butterfly with striking yellow and black tiger stripes and distinctive orange spots near its tail. The Swallowtail is typically seen in gardens and urban park environments. Next to the Monarch, Swallowtails are the most common variety of butterflies.

In Chinese culture, two butterflies flying in tandem represent love. Butterfies symbolize a long life. In fact, in Mandarin, the word butterfly is hu-tieh, meaning 70 years. In the U.S., releasing butterflies at the end of a wedding ceremony bodes well for the marraige. 

The butterfly is the symbol of creativity, freedom and joy. Butterfies also represent growth and change, leaving the comfort, familiarity and safety of their cocoon to discover a new world, in a new form, trusting that their untested wings will allow them to fly with confidence, grace and freedom. A butterfly teaches us that exiting the cocoon suddenly opens a new door. It shows us the beauty and power of personal transformation. It is a natural process, just like breathing, but unlike breathing it can’t be forced or manipulated in any way. It is an inside job. 

Often transformation comes through hardships. We go kicking and screaming. Then one day we take a deep breath, and submit to the process of change that is brewing inside us. Other times, transformation comes to us by choice. We begin to see things more clearly and it becomes an invitation to learn, grow and change the trajectory of our lives. Whatever way it comes about, the outcome is the same. Like the butterfly, we all have the opportunity and ability to emerge from our cocoons—transformed.

1-Photo credit: Marianne Bickett
2-Photo credit: Original watercolor of Tiger Swallowtail Butterfly by Christie Michelsen: brightspiritrising.com

The Joy of Electric Bikes Like I've Never Experienced Before

“The Bicycle Has A Soul…It Will Give You Emotions that You Will Never Forget.”
—Mario Cipollini

My friend James “Jimi” Hunter, a self-described former “extreme biker,” invited me to go riding with him one day. He has two Sonders E-Bikes in his garage—charged and ready to go. All I had to do was drive to his home and we were off to the races—so to speak.

In 1987, while racing in the Veteran's Class (men 35 and older), Jimi finished 3rd in the Cross Country race, and took first place in the downhill at the World Mountain Biking Championships. He also won the sport and masters class in the Ultimate Kamikaze Downhill in Bishop the same year. Eventually, a nasty crash, broken collar bone, severe concussion and severed vertebral artery forced him to give up high risk biking and racing. 

Upon reflection, he said, "It was all about ego. Now, I just ride for pleasure. E-BIkes are about hitting the EZ button and enjoying the ride,” he added. “It allows people who wouldn’t consider riding a bike any more to revisit the recreational aspects of the sport.” His enthusiasm for E-Biking has won over some converts. His 70 year old brother in law, a psychiatrist in Texas bought one and “fricken loves it,” he said. His sister and nephew are getting one, and after two outings with Jimi I found myself hooked and placed my order online.

We rode the hills and valleys of Los Gatos, Monte Sereno and Saratoga, CA. After living in this area for over 40 years, Jimi knows all the nooks and crannies like the back of his hand. We explored the sweet spots—quiet neighborhoods off the beaten paths, including magnificent estates, vineyards, and breathtaking panoramic vistas of the Santa Cruz Mountains.

People have been riding bikes since the 1800s. The precursor to a bicycle as we know it was a Draisienne or “Running Machine,” invented by Barn Karl von Drais of Germany. It had frames and two wheels but no pedals. It was propelled by walking and gliding.
I still remember my first Schwinn bicycle and the feeling of joy and sense of freedom I felt when I took off my training wheels. The advantage of an electric bike is it makes riding more convenient, easy and fun, and a healthy addition to any lifestyle. The pedal assist feature of electric bikes not only works out your muscles, especially on an incline, but provides the rider aerobic exercise as well. For those using it as a means of transportation to get to and from work or, run an errand. It shortens the time and distance to your final destination.

Another advantage of an E-Bike, is you can navigate hilly terrains without a sweat by the push of a button at the top of the handle bar that activates the pedal assist feature. As we age, we have less capacity to power up. Knees and quads tend to ache, and the back can stiffen. With an electric bike you don’t need to worry about getting halfway through your ride and caving-in to exhaustion, worrying whether you’ll make it back home. In that sense the electric motor of an E-Bike is your friend.

And, who cares if someone thinks you’re cheating? It’s not like we were taking steroids or looking to compete in the tor de France. You can’t cheat at getting around and having fun. Besides, Electric bikes are designed to break down the barriers to entry to the world of cycling. It’s no more cheating than using gears that were invented to assist a cyclist to climb a hill more efficiently or increase your speed on the straightaways. Electric bikes make it possible for more people of all levels of fitness to ride without being intimidated by hills, wind or any extra weight they may be carrying. For non athletes there are other fringe benefits of cycling including the freedom from traffic jams, not having to stop for gas, and not having to pay a parking fee.

During my first ride out in the Santa Cruz foothills, I couldn’t stop smiling. It was so liberating. The motor powered electric assist feature is what transforms what would normally be an ordinary bike ride to a Zen-like experience. The experience leaves you with a sense of awe, appreciation and gratitude for being alive.

So where does one get an E-Bike and how much does it cost? E-bikes can range from $800 to $8000 or more. I mentioned earlier that I placed my order online. I chose a white bodied Sondors Premium Electric Bike with pin stripe blue trim on the tire rim as created by Storm Sanders as seen in the photo. It was like placing an order for a Tesla. They had a special pre-sale program of their lastest two models are going for $699 and $899. The main features that sold me were that it was lighter and slimmer than the older models, holds a longer battery charge and can be folded in half for easier storage.

I also liked the bio of its creator, Storm Sonders who grew up in Latvia and makes his home in Malibu. Ever since he was a young boy his parents believed there was someting “off" about him. He was socially awkward, yet displayed a talent for brilliance. He finished high school at 14 and went to an art school to study to be a sculptor. In his early 20s, he was living in Chicago, building wooden models for Mattel and Fisher-Price. He went into business on his own, was very successful with many ventures but it didn’t bring him happiness. He sought out therapist and found out he had Asperger’s syndrome, a mild form of autism. 

He got interested in electric bikes following a knee injury. But, it retailed for $4000, far more than he was willing to pay for a bike. So, he decided to design his own, found a fundraising partner and together they developed a crowdfunding campaign. Early investors committed $499 for a brightly covered, fat-tire beach cruiser. Thanks to my friend Jimi, this was my first introduction to E-Bikes and I didn’t need to look any further. I liked what I saw and experienced, and can’t wait for my order to be shipped.🙂

Electric Bike Review (EBR) website:

https://electricbikereview.com/guides/true-cost-of-electric-bikes/

Entrepreneur with Asperger’s peddling affordable electric bike by Charles Fleming

http://www.latimes.com/business/autos/la-fi-hy-autism-entrepreneur-20150228-story.html

The Scoop on Liquid Nitrogen Ice Cream at Creamistry

"Life is like an ice cream cone, enjoy it before it melts away."
—Dennis Augustine

On a hot day like today, 81° here in Northern California (yesterday it was 94°, “we all scream for ice cream.”
Remember that poet getting on in years who said, “If I had it to do over again I would eat more ice cream…?
I’m with her, why wait and have regrets, unless of course you’re a diabetic, and even then there are choices.

One of the newer kids on the block in customized handcrafted fresh ice cream using Liquid Nitrogen is Creamistry. It’s a play on words: Chemistry and Creamery. The rapid freezing process (—321° Fahrenheit) provides the smoothest, richest and creamiest frozen delight. They call their servers “Creamologists.” Yes, I know it sounds like you're at your dermatologist's office. 

Part of the fun of liquid nitrogen ice cream shops, is watching your ice cream being made. When liquid nitrogen is mixed with your ice cream base, it makes the air around it very cold. This creates fumaroles of white fog that engulfs your Creamologist behind the counter top and plexiglass panel. It makes you feel like you are on the movie set of Star Trek. Beam me up Scotty! Cecile and I had fun watching and being part of a group of customers snapping photos with our cell phone cameras of this interesting phenomenon. It’s a great place to take your kids and grandkids. 

Once the fog clears, your freshly made ice cream is whisked away to the toppings bar where its adorned with your choice of toppings. They use all natural, organic ingredients and boast over 70 flavors and toppings. There are rich Vegan alternatives and Nitro shakes on the menu of choices.

We tried our first Creamstry delight in Palm Dessert. But there is one located in downtown Palo Alto with a national roll out under way as we speak.

Liquid nitgrogen has been around forever. As we learned in our science studies, Nitrogen is part of the Periodic Table bearing the symbol N and atomic number 7. I used it to freeze off warts in my clinic when I was a practicing podiatrist and many other surgeons use it to elminate cancerous cells. 

Besides making ice cream, liquid nitrogen which comes in pressurized tanks and vacuum flasks, has been used in the food and beverage service industry to displace oxygen from the package of let’s say your favorite potato chips, before it is sealed. It’s the presence of moisture that deteriorates the food quality.

The Culinary Institute of America instituted a major in culinary science. As part of obtaining their degree, students learn how to use liquid nitrogen as a coolant to not only make a smoother batch of ice cream, but to freeze strawberries in liquid nitrogen and then smash them to produce strawberry dust that could be sprinkled over a dessert. It is also used in the kitchen to flash-freeze herbs or alcohol. Bartenders use it to supercool your glass giving it a sophisticated dramatic-looking vapor.

Brunch and Bonding Time with my son Jason at the Bell Tower Cafe'

This charming Saratoga neighborhood eatery near downtown is housed in a converted historic church that dates back to 1896.
And, in spite of its religious heritage you don’t have to pray that the food you are about to be served is good. It “is” good. The white egg Persian Omelette with four organic eggs, basil, tomatoes and feta cheese is one of my favorites. Jason had the California Omelette.
The Cafe’ sports three patios with optional fresh-air dining that is peaceful and serene and welcomes and accomodates dogs. They are only open for breakfast and American-style lunch, including an assortment of tasty desserts showcased in their bakery display case. The Cafe’ is known for quick and friendly service and the freshest of ingredients.
I couldn’t resist ringing one of the 9 antique bells on the iron stand in the quaint reception nook as patrons waited for their names to be called.
While pausing half way through our meal, I saw a sign on the wall which read, “The Fondest Memories are made Gathered around the Table,” and, all I can think of was how nice it was to have my son back in the Bay Area.

Hiking, Swinging Over a Creek, and Visiting a Toppled 1,000 yr old Advocate Tree in Aptos, CA

After my story of the uprooted 30 ft. Aleppo tree in our gated community appeared in the Los Gatos Times Observer, I forwarded it to Kathleen O’Malley, an Aqua Yoga fitness instructor at BayClub, Courtside. Like myself, Kathy is a devoted nature lover. She emailed me a photo along with a note to let me know that at the moment she received my news item, she was at the Forest of Nisene Marks State Park in Aptos, CA. She was at the site of the 1,000 year old "Advocate Tree," that had toppled during the winter storms. I decided I had to go see it for myself and pay my respects to this grand daddy of old-growth redwoods. So I recruited my friend Jimi Hunter to join me.

Jimi and I made several attempts to find the fallen remains of The Advocate Tree by following the map (poorly, I may add) given to us by the ranger at the entrance to the park. We retraced our steps, crossed wooden bridges, and climbed over other fallen tree limbs. I even slid off a long slippery log into the creek—landing partially on my right lower extremity—while trying to get to the the other side. Fortunately my cell phone camera in my left pant pocket didn't get wet. It's been said that Sometimes you have to make a wrong turn before you find your way. My wife Cecile will tell you that's the story of my life:-). It turns out Jimi is as geographically challenged as I am. But perserverance paid off and we found the giant redwood.

Before it fell from grace, The Historic Advocate Tree, was an old growth coastal redwood, more than 250 feet tall and measuring 45 feet in circumference. The majestic tree was named after a conservation group, responsible for the maintenance and improvements of the nearly 10,000 acre park including 30 miles worth of walking trails. The climb to the top of the massive 20 ft. root structure that was completely upended was somewhat daunting, especially for someone like myself who has a bit of phobia about heights.

The Advocate Tree had a colorful past. It was around during the time of the Anasazi (“Ancient Ones”) cliff dwellers, believed to be ancestors of the moden Pueblo Indians. It was alive when Genghis Khan ruled Mongolia; when Joan of ark was burned at the stake; while William of Normandy invaded England; when the Spanish Conquistadors conquered the Americas, during the African Slave Trade, The Salem Witch Trials, The American Revolution and the Civil War. 

According to a local resident, he had heard the colossal tree topple over in a resounding crash that shook him to his core on Monday, January 9, 2017. When we got to the site, there it lay—broken into several monumental sections. I now understood why locals were saddened, feeling as if they had lost an old and faithful friend. 

The California Poppy—where California Bees Sleep

"At the close of a summer day, tired-winged bees to a safe shelter fly, to poppies, who wrap them away...in a lullaby..."
—Grace Hibbard, 1901

Thanks to the record rains we had this past winter and Spring, the signature orange-golden California poppy flowers are blooming. I took the first two and fourth photo in the wooded areas behind our town house.

The California poppy is an attractive native wildflower. More than a century ago, in 1903 it became the state flower and protected by state law prohibiting anyone from picking or destroying it. April 6 was dubbed California Poppy Day. 

On cooler, windy, cloudy days and chilly nights, the poppy closes its’ petals to protect it’s reproductive organs. The golden poppies are what the children call sleeping flowers; and as evening approaches they close up. Tucked snugly inside the petals in a warm embrace one can find bees fast asleep with their legs tucked up, and their shiny bodies covered with pollen. 

Early Spanish settlers called the poppy copa del ora (cup of gold) due to its cup like appearance when fully open. 
California poppies make their greatest showing, on the grazed lands of California hillsides since animals avoid eating the bitter-tasting plants. 

Native California Indians used poppies for food and medicine. The plants were boiled or roasted on hot stones to eat as greens. Other tribes used the flower as a potent scalp rub to kill lice, and still other tribes used it as a poultice of fresh root for toothaches. The poppy plant also has sedative and analgesic properties and some say it can be used to treat pateints with insomnia and anxiety.
Photo credit: The fourth photo with the bumble bee foraging for pollen was taken by Kathy Keetley Garvey.

Postscript: Grace Hibbard's full poem circa 1901:

WHERE CALIFORNIA BEES SLEEP

When the cold white fog rolls in from the sea,

At the close of a summer day,

Tired—winged bees to a safe shelter fly,

To poppies, who wrap them away

In blankets of soft, shining, satin sheen—

Silken coverlets fit for kings,—

And breezes sway in a lullaby way

The bees with the tired wings.

But lo! when the the sun shines out once again,

And kisses the tops of the trees,

The poppies unfold into cups of gold,

And away fly the honey-bees.

In Honor of Earth Day: Visiting with Canada Geese & their Goslings

The destiny of humans cannot be separate from the destiny of Earth [and all living things].                                                                                                                          —Thomas Berry

Cecile and I have been captivated by these Canada Geese and their adorable goslings we visit during our morning walk at the main lake—a stone’s throw away from where we live. 
Geese symbolize the sacred circle of life, cooperation, communication, knowing when to lead and when to follow. I was suprised to learn that Geese are not really from Canada. The true migratory goose was almost driven to extinction from excessive hunting over 50 years ago…

By happenstance, wildlife officials in some areas of the country began a national recovery program by taking and incubating nest eggs from “decoy” geese they had captured to lure other geese coming down from Canada.

Eventually the young were deposited throughout the US., sometimes in areas where geese weren’t present. Consequently, the resident goose was born. Resident geese don’t migrate to Canada since in part, they don’t know the way…Eventually, their young offspring were drawn to U.S. parks, lakes and ponds…They stay in the U.S. because this is where they were born…”However,” says journalist Mary Lou Simms, "If some handsome, non-migratory dude finds the love of his life in a migratory group, his life instantly changes. He becomes part of the cycle for which he was originally intended. They head for Canada because the female determines the nesting site.”

Canada geese resist being touched or petted…The way they show affection for humans and each other is by a honk, chirp or coo. Geese usually hiss when strangers come too close…especially, while protecting their newborns. “When they fall in love," says Simms, "It is a lifetime committment. They mate once a year and the parents-gander (male) and goose (female)…raise their young goslings together, sharing the responsibiities.” As they say, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.🙂

Resident geese—who have fewer challenges in the wild—can live to be 25 or 30 years as opposed to migratory geese who are exposed to CLIMATE CHANGE which on one hand improves breeding due to warmer conditions but on the hand, places the mother at more risk of being attacked by predators.
Source cited: Mary Lou Simms, Journalist, Investigative reporter for The Huffington Post blog

The Baby Boomer, The Millennial, & J. Crew's CEO:

Cecile and I had a party to go to in honor of Michelle and Kyle. “Dress casual,” she said. Music to my ears, I thought. After all, my favorite wardrobe these days is Lululemon yoga wear. Don’t knock it, until you try it, guys. It’s like wearing PJs all day.
I compromized. I put on a blue Lululemon shirt, a pair of blue jeans and a grey J Crew Outfitter pullover sweater with a half zip that my fashion conscious son Jason had given me for Christmas last year. There was an unseasonable chill in the air at the pre-dinner backyard cocktail party at the Metrulas family home, and I praised myself for selecting the right choice of clothing to wear.

Suddenly, I noticed our young friend, Noel motion with his fingers to his chest and then then pointing to my chest. I realized this was men’s speak for, “Dude we are wearing the same sweater.” I’m sure this has happend to almost everyone at one time or another, when you suddenly realize that someone is wearing the exact same oufit as you. 
As fate would have it, we were seated across from each other. A Millennial and an aging “Baby Boomer,” with over 30 years between us, sitting there like two book ends. Noel’s fiancee, Kacy, a psychiatry resident at Stanford said, “You look like twins,” as she smiled micheviously. In the end, Noel and I were pretty cool about it, laughing about it in fact, as we partied on. After all, we didn’t have to worry about the late Joan RIvers of the Fashion Police getting on our case for confusing the public. 

After a few days went by, I got this brainstorm to email J. Crew Chairman and CEO Millard “Mickey” Drexler. Really, no lie! In fact, I discovered that he had extended an invitation to J. Crew customers to give him feedback on the companies e-commerce site. So I did. I told him about the party, how Noel and I were dressed alike in our J Crew sweaters. The one observation I had made about their website was that it markets to a much younger crowd, and one market they were overlooking was more mature dudes like myself.

He promptly wrote back: “Hi Dennis, hope everthing is well—thanks so much for your email—totally agree with your comments and we’re actually working on showing more people of different ages...who do in fact wear our clothes or ‘should be wearing our clothes'…Have a great weekend!" Best, Mickey. 

Whoops, I need to go. Noel and I have a photoshoot with GQ:-)

Clouds and Thoughts and How we Choose to See Them

Clouds and Thoughts and How we Choose See Them

There are times when clouds look majestic and fanciful and other times when they look ominous and threatening.
As a long time meditator I have often compared clouds to thoughts. Some thoughts are friendly, uplifting and fun.
For example when things are going my way I feel like I am on a proverbial “Cloud 9." 
Other thoughts are strange and downright terrifying. This is when it seems everything that can go wrong “will” go wrong.
As human beings we prefer clouds we like over those we don’t like. It is the same with thoughts. We embrace the thoughts that make us feel good and resist the ones that make us feel badly.

One of my meditation teachers, Gil Fronsdale, at the Insight Meditation Center in Redwood City, CA once told us that when he was growing up in Norway, his father told him: “Now Gil, your mind is going to come up with a lot of crazy thoughts. Don’t believe them!”

In other words, just like clouds, thoughts are variable, transient and impermanent. Trying to make a dark cloud go away is as futile as trying to make a dark, scary thought disappear. Just as we can’t control our thoughts, we can’t control the weather. The best strategy is to patiently wait it out. As the song in Little Ophan Annie goes: “The sun will come out, tomorrow….” 

In the meantime, take these wonderful clouds for what they are—expressions of atmospheric moods, Nature’s artistry and poetry in flight.

Photos: I Took these photos in and around our neighborhood in Los Gatos, CA

https://enjoyyourlifenow.net