Father’s Day Barbecue at Kim and AL Chien’s lovely Abode

“The Heart of Hospitality is about creating space for someone to feel seen and heard and loved. It’s about declaring your table a safe zone, a place of warmth and nourishment.”                                                                                            —Shauna Niequist

It was called 5:30 PM on one of the hottest days of the year. AL’s wonderful parent’s Dana and Jack were already present. Our daughter Michelle had just arrived from Park City, Utah where she attended a Bridal Shower party for childhood friend, Elisa Sabes. 
Cecile, our son Jason and I arrived next. Jason’s friend Julie Poutre stopped by for drinks and appetizers. Michelle's husband Kyle arrived after having lunch with his dad, Ed Lewis and long time girlfriend, Gerry, followed by wine tasting at J. Lohr and Testarossa Winery. And, of course there were the dogs, Hunter and Baily, and Michelle and Kyle’s dog, Decker who were hoping against hope for some scraps of food when no one was looking.

We sat inside in the air-conditioned family room for the first hour because there weren’t enough oxygen masks available to sit outside.🙂It was like a sauna out there. An hour later though, things cooled off enough (except for AL) to relocate on the Chien’s beautiful entertainment patio in the back yard.
AL played 18 holes of golf earlier in the day and if it weren’t for the gatorade would have suffered heat stroke.🙂Then, he barbecued for all of us. Thanks AL. you’re a mensch. We owe you one. As AL pointed out in a earlier post, he and Kim decided on a red, white and blue Father’s Day theme since they are always in Tahoe for the 4th of July. 

I’d say that Michelle is very lucky to have married into such a thoughtful, fun-loving, and hospitable, family but the truth is Cecile, Jason and I feel very much the same. I know Michelle would agree that we don’t think of the Chien’s and Kyle’s dad and girlfriend Gerry as Kyle’s family but part of “our” family as well.

After appetizers, and before dinner, we all sat down on the patio to watch a slideshow of Michelle and Kyle’s Wedding of May 20th, that had just arrived from the photographer. Once again, we got to experience the beauty and wonder and love that we felt when Michelle and Kyle tied the knot in the magical redwood Grove at Silverado Resort and Spa in Napa. Through the skillful photograher’s eye, we got to see poignant and candid shots we weren’t aware took place amongst the 170 family and friends that were in attendance. Every one’s eyes were misty. I sensed Michelle and Kyle were probably thinking, “pinch me,” did this really happen? Yes, it did, and our lives have all been made the better for it.

Michelle & Kyle Tie the Knot in the Heart of Napa Valley

“Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life."
—Richard Bach

The Grove at Silverado Resort and Spa in Napa is an all outdoor wedding venue situated in the middle of our two golf courses. It is surrounded by towering oaks, beautiful gardens, and spectacular views of the greens and mountain ranges. It is the reason it is one of the most popular and inspired settings to get married. When we saw our beautiful daughter Michelle in her wedding dress surrounded by her lovely bridesmaids our hearts melted. It finally struck us, we are giving our daughter away to Kyle, the love of her life. We couldn’t be more pleased with her choice.

A Successful marriage is not about finding a person you can live with, but discovering that special partner you can’t possibly live without. Michelle and Kyle had many opportunities to meet: They went to Cal Poly, attended a semester abroad in Florence, one of the most romantic cities in the world, were in Las Vegas on the same weekend, to name a few, but it was not their time, yet. As our Jason, who officiated the wedding ceremony with creative brilliance, love, and inspired humor said: “The universe wouldn’t place them together again until four years later, when Michelle saw on Facebook that Kyle was getting ready to move to NYC where she lived at the time. She sent Kyle a note and said she’d love to connect with a fellow Cal Poly alum once he gets settled in. A couple of weeks later he invited her to a housewarming party,” and the rest as they say is history.

This begs the question how are couples fated to meet? What is the mysterious matchmaking forces at play behind the scenes that make it happen? In ancient Chinese folklore, the wise sages believed that there is a red thread that magically connects two people destined to become lovers, regardless of time, space or circumstance called, “The Red String of Fate.” Legend has it that the string may stretch or tangle but the connection can never be broken. Rumi, the beloved 13th Persian Sufi poet put it this way: “Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere, they are in each other’s souls,” to which I would add, long before their physical bodies are revealed and the mind registers that, “This is the one! 

As we walked down the bridal path leading to The Grove, the iconic Beatles song: “Here comes the Sun,” was playing. I thought it was a great metaphor for letting go of the youthful uncertainties of the past and basking in the sunlight of marital bliss. It also reminded me when Michelle was born Cecile gave her the Hebrew name—Hila, which means, “Halo of Glowing Light.” She has been the Light of our Life ever since and has radiated that same light to her beloved Kyle, his family, and all their friends. Since meeting Kyle, who has an incredible Lightness of Being in his own right, we have never seen Michelle so happy. When children find true love, parents find true joy. The Toast: Here’s to the past, and the Red String of Fate, that brought you together; Here’s to the present, for all the love and light you share with one another and with your family and friends; Here’s to the future, may all your dreams and wishes come true; and, as you go about your life’s journey together, may you be peaceful, may you be safe, and may you be happy. Congratulations! We love you. 
P.S. I will always remember the Father-Daughter dance song: "Unforgettable," you chose for us. You are unforgettable and so was your marriage to Kyle and the celebration with family and friends.