Honoring the Fond Memories of Our Late Fathers at the Crepevine Restaurant in San Jose

“My father didn’t tell me how to live. He lived, and let me watch him do it.” —Clarence Budington Kelland

Sometimes a bike ride is not just a bike ride. My friend Bill and I decided to ride to San Jose on the Los Gatos Creek Trail. We elected to eat at the Crepevine in the Willow Glen area. We were seated outdoors next to a man who had ordered lunch for himself and his elderly mother who hadn’t arrived yet. More on that later.

While my dad Frank Augustine, died on December 18, 2017, in Hoboken, NJ, just shy of 101; Bill’s dad Irving Rothenberg, died on August 21, 2023, in Cleveland, Ohio, at the age of 94. It goes without saying, that Bill’s loss is more acute and raw than mine. I sensed he wanted to talk about his father as I did before and after my father died. In fact, we had been speaking about Irving for some time before and after the many trips Bill took to Cleveland to check in on him. Without having met Irving, I felt I got to know him a bit through Bill’s memories.

As most of you know I have had the privilege of honoring my late dad and mom on Facebook a few times a year: On their birthdays, the anniversary of their passing, Mother’s and Father’s Day, and Veteran’s Day for dad. So, other than saying that dad was honored for contributions to his community and country by the City of Hoboken’s former mayor, The State Senator of NJ, The NJ Board of Chosen Freeholders, the Civilian Conservation Corp Legacy Journal, the Office of Senior Affairs, and for being a Boy Scout Leader for 25 years, with Bill’s blessings, I am going to focus on his dad, Irving who was a graduate of Ohio State University, became an Architect, served as an Air Force 1st Lieutenant, became a private pilot, and worked a full career in the construction business.

However, what is equally impressive about Irving, were his many hobbies. Bill described his dad—whom he affectionately calls, Irving—"a man of many interests and activities, with seemingly endless energy.” At different stages of his life, Irving was a boater, sailor, canoeist, swimmer, tennis player, water and snow skier, racquet ball player, runner, and camp counselor. He also engaged in Israeli dancing, fencing, bicycling, water coloring, SCUBA diving, and was a world traveler. As for those professional sports fans, Irving was a Browns, Indians, Cavaliers, and Buckeye fan, through and through. Last but not least, he was a passionate violinist who played from the age of five, until shortly before his death. As you can see in the photo this brought him pleasure.

More importantly, Bill describes his father as having been a kind man, at his core a good, and a gentle man, who was really interested in the well-being of others—A real “mensch" (Yiddish for someone who is kind and considerate). Thanks to Irving, Bill involved himself in most of the activities listed above. He participated in virtually every team sport, became a boy scout like myself, attended countless summer camps, became a big sports fan in his own right, did Polar Bear swims, ice skated, and participated in 10K races with his dad. He is a true “son of Irving,” proud and grateful for being given a birds-eye view on how to live life to its fullest.

Back to the man we met at the Crepevine Restaurant. His mother never arrived. Apparently, her caregiver had to take her back home, as she had an unpleasant mishap, and fell asleep. The dutiful son was going to bring the food he had ordered for her to her home. He told me his mom is 88, the same age as my mother Maria, before she passed away. His father, he added, died at 94, the same age as Irving. May they RIP.